HERE'S a thought...

I've decided to try my hand at writing my own little chapter as a humorist if I were writing it to be published in a book called "101 Damnations: A Humorist's Guide To Personal Hells" (note: It's an actual book.)

I can't tell you how irritated I get with formalities. Step back and think for a minute. People generally tend to avoid other people, right? It's not absolutely necessary for them to talk to one another, so why bother? I'm not ashamed to say that I fall into this category. It's why I will never allow myself to work in the fast food industry. My summer job is somewhat like that of a receptionist; I sit at the front desks of the residence halls up on Saint Mary's campus (which is actually the school I'm attending, in addition to having two parents employed there) and take care of the problems that arise when the summer guests get persnickety. Perfect job for someone who doesn't like large crowds, right?

Don't get me wrong or anything; I enjoy watching people as much as anyone else. I find the human race to be quite astounding. I just don't enjoy interacting with them when they're angry, upset, or looking for someone to direct their frustrations at (unless, of course, we're talking about a close friend). So when these summer guests walk into the building and I smile and say hello, the only thing I expect back is another hello in return. Sure, I'll answer if they want to make small talk or ask me how I'm doing. However, if you ask me that inevitable question of "How are you?", do NOT turn to your friend and start talking without waiting for my response. If you ask me how I am, I assume you are genuinely interested, however stupid it may seem, because I don't even know you.

People who ask the question of "How are you?" merely because it is a formality upset me greatly. It truly makes the person you're asking feel like crap when you immediately turn to whomever is standing next to you and begin running your mouth without even waiting for a simple "Fine, thanks."

Here's a thought: Just don't ask me that question.

Cynically yours,

Miranda